My Flight Back

I don’t usually bother with the in-flight entertainment. I keep a book in my backpack which I turn to, to keep myself occupied. But this time, I had to look up at what was available. It wasn’t because I forgot to keep a book. It was because of this female sitting in the seat behind me.

Just wouldn’t shut up. She had a baby with her. Coochy cooing your baby might seem cute to many people, but there is a limit. At least for me. I mean.. hogaya yaar. Ek baar, do baar, BAS! Then it stops being cute.

Yapping away. I hope you have changed the menu. I don’t like the food served on Jet Airways. Oh you haven’t changed the menu. Ok I will have this and this and this. What is this.. Ok I will have that too. This sounds good. Yes. I will have that too.

This is when she doesn’t like the menu. Imagine how it would be if the menu was to her taste!

The thing that got me to pull out the headset was this idiot asking the flight attendant: Is the champagne good? Is the soup better or the salad?

arrrrgggghhhh.

In one way, it was nice she was yapping away. It annoyed me so much that I pulled out the headphones and started going through the in-flight entertainment. Movies and all that – err.. don’t really enjoy watching movies in a plane. I can’t comment or criticise and no one is there to listen to it even if I do. So I went over to the music selection they had.

Ahhh.. for the next 3 hrs and 45 minutes, I was in a trance. They had a category for Ghazals and I spent the entire flight time listening to Mehdi Hassan. Goes great with Bacardi and coke.

The flight attendant was kind enough to keep it flowing and thankfully remembered how I like my drink. I really forgot everything else. Yes .. EVERYTHING else. The head just went blank. Music in my ears, Bacardi down my throat. Definitely drowned out that annoying bitch in the seat behind mine.

Some of the ghazals I listened to:

• Bhooli Bisri Chand Ummeedain
• Shola Tha Jal Boojha Hoon
• Duniya Kissi Ke Pyar Mein
• Tanha Tanha Mat Socha Kar
• Zindagi Mein To Sabhi
• Apno Ne Diye Gham

Would be awesome if I had a stroke in the flight or the plane would crash or something. I would have died in peace. Here I am again – looking forward to… in fact HOPING for death. Ab aur nahin hota. Tired of feeling helpless and useless.

Zindagi hai bewafaa… dhokha dekar jaayegi
Maut hai meri dilruba… saath lekar jaayegi.